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Vanderpump Rules S08 E16 (Witches of WeHo Whine)

Updated: Apr 23, 2020

We left off with the senior pump rules cast & the Vanderpumps heading back from Vegas after seeing the Schwartz's get remarried. The ladies think Dayna can do better than Brett, Stassi & Kristen are still feuding & Lala wants James to be sober...

We start off with the newbies in a bartending class, which you know maybe we should start from the beginning with this crew but I feel lie the bartenders should well, know how to bartend... I would say maybe its a touchup class but they seemed to be learning some pretty basic skills. Brett loved telling Dayna that Max got his dick wet in Vegas and her confessional was confusing. She seems to now be into Brett but she seemed upset that Max was also going on, does she really want to be with Max and not Brett? Regardless, Max is the new Jax & I wouldn't touch either with 182 condoms on...

Off to SUR where Scheana bounces up to Lisa, after she clocks into work to chat. Bless Scheana for freezing her eggs, but girl you aren't having fun being single if you are freezing her eggs. Thankfully Lisa calls her out on it! Also Scheana darling, the world and all the men you are trying to trap don't need to know you are freezing your eggs, it is okay to keep some things to yourself. All I know, if I were Lisa I would tell Scheana to not clock in before she sits and talks to her, I wouldn't want to be paying Scheana to talk to me. Lisa is right though, Scheana's expectations for the male gender are too much, you wont get that level of thoughtfulness from your husband you either need to be fantastic at planting seeds or tell em'.

Scheana and her injuries... I really want to go one season without her getting hurt, I'm tired of that storyline. Just incase Scheana ever reads this, I want her to know that her doctor told her not to twerk because she shouldn't be twerking anyway. Love ya girl! Anyway, she heads over to Daynas apartment to surprise tell her she got a psychic for her bay to connect to her dead mother. A few things here... First off, Dayna is totally correct, that emotionally is a lot to handle and Scheana hasn't ever lost a parent so she doesn't know. Second, Scheana and Dayna aren't exactly great friends, remember, they are in a weird love shape together. Third, Scheana, we know Scheana loves giving gifts but it seems like she is putting her gifts towards the wrong people, need we remind her about Max and the Thanksgiving AppleWatch. I am here for a good gift but make sure people appreciate it. Fourth, I am sort of super tired of seeing them sitting in Daynas apartment with bare walls on her couch. Can we either put a drink in their hand, have them do something or at the very least put some frames up on Dyana's walls! Lastly, I'm glad Dayna called her out for the weird surprise gift but but i didn't need to see any of that scene. I don't need to see any Scheana scenes, she's trying too hard to be relevant and its the same song and dance every season with her.

Villa Rosa, onto the planning of the proposal! Beau has the perfect day set up for Stassi! Propose in a graveyard, private dinner at Villa Rosa afterwards for some cocktails, with her family and friends. All the fun planning between Lisa & Beau while Stassi's at the gynecologist...

Back to James's sobriety. In real time I'm not sure how long its actually been but props to him for still being sober and being out at the club. I'd rather talk about James's sobriety than the cheap looking outfits the SUR babies have and the Brett conversation about being eskimo brothers with Max plus this Scheana angle of the situation. Whew, time for a deep breath, Scheana, please stop trying to be relevant, have a cheeseburger with cheese (Shout out Raquel), cut your nails and let's get you some new clothes then maybe we can find you the type of man you are looking for, Lets not forget, you attract what you put out in the world.

Seeing James and Lala in the studio is interesting, I do think Lala likes recording and thinks it brings out the best in James, so double win in that situation. I really think she wants to help James on his way to recovery, she went through it and knows its not easy. Plus he was her first friend in LA who really empowered her, its nice to see she's really looking for his potential.

The main event of the show, the Witches of WeHo wine event... According to Kristen, she does all the work, Katie pops in and Stassi does nothing but get paid. And to be fair, earlier in the episode we see Kristen struggling to put together a popup banner for the event while Stassi is still berating poor Beau for still not being engaged. Plus, Stassi multiple times has admitted to not wanting to renew the contract and says she's the Beyonce of the group, time to go out solo. Does that mean we can be expecting a Basic B^tch wine soon... I hope so!

Interview with whatever magazine was priceless with Bravo shooting back to how their relationship actually is vs. the rainbow they are trying to paint in their wine partnership. It clearly in reality isn't working out and maybe its time to pull the plug. PLUS, sorry I don't want to pay $25 for a bottle of wine that I may not love... We dip into some other BS dramatics trying to keep he show interesting, like the Tom's being challenged to a game fo softball by the new SUR babies, loser cleans bathrooms. We also have, Max trying to talk to Dayna which is just confusing. The first thing from Daynas mouth is just asking how mini-scheana from last weeks episode to bone town is, girl get it together, do you want to be with him or not? Pick a lane. We have drunk Ariana and I LOVE Drunk Ariana! I don't think weve seen her since her NASCAR birthday.

Back to the engagement festivities! Beau clearly wants Kristen to be involved at some level, she did introduce Beau and Stassi. Plus, look how upset Stassi was a few seasons ago when she missed Katies engagement. One big difference that I want to call out here, looking back at old seasons, I don't actually know how close Stassi and Kristen ever were. Every season they have some huge fight, Kristen f^cked Stassi's boyfriend, really, are you that close? They spent most of their time fighting. But Beau really can't catch a break with this one, he looks so beaten down and he's trying so hard to make her happy! I do think Beau and Kristen can be surface level social friends, but Kristen needs to understand where Stassi is coming from not wanting to be friends and to accept that Beau ultimately is going to be on Stassi's side to support her. She needs to get over it and just accept it even though it may be a tough pill to swallow. Kristen, are you and Scheana just no longer relevant on the show?

Anyway, they tease off next week wit the proposal which I cant wait for as well as some drama that Kristen and Carter are stirring up and the softball game!

Until next time,

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